2010 - A Year to Remember

What a difference a year makes!

2010 I will never forget you. It's a year where there were so many joys, laughter and tough moments. We welcomed a new member to the family - Baby Adik is a National Day Baby. There were fireworks that night and we enjoyed the view from the hospital room - it was like a party, friends and their kids were making so much noise and the nurses left us to celebrate.

Baby Abang goes to Daycare. The first few months were tough; he cried almost everyday but now he looks forward to going to school, speaks too much and loves to sing and dance. Sometimes I wonder if he is growing too fast - seems like that to me based on the questions and things he says. Last night he told his Abah he wants to play with Abah's army friends' kids and asked if the kids were his age. Army friends?

I now have a sister-in-law. My elder brother decided that it's time to settle down - yes, after so many girlfriends and headaches he caused mom (and I), he ties the knot. Don't know whether it's scary; he married an Aries/ Tiger, my age and a few days younger than me! And we got along just fine. Few good things about him being married, we see each other at least once a week at mom's, we have dinner together and he finally listens to my opinions and not take it personally! He also goes to family weddings and visits - now that is a HUGE change.

I got myself a Ford Fiesta. Lime green - cheerful just like me. We moved offices and there was no way hubby could drop me off at work. We did our calculations and it's best for me to just get a car. It feels good to FINALLY have my own car! Yes, I did have a car when I was single but my late father put the deposit to that. Now it's mine! I must say this - I MISS MY MORNING RIDE WITH HUBBY!

2010 is also a year where we are reminded that life is not always smooth and we must always be thankful to Him for all He gives us and put us through. In April, 10 days before I left for a business trip I was asked to see my gynea immediately. It was a Sat and we were on our way to lunch when we got that call. The nurse said something about my baby. It was a very stressful 10 days after - going to the hospital to get some tests done and waiting for results. I was close to cancelling my biz trip and felt at ease the day before my trip. In Europe, I was unable to fly out of Cannes - thanks to the volcanic ash. I remembered waking up to get ready to go to the airport only to get a text message from a good friend informing me that the airport in Amsterdam was closed. That morning, I went for a walk by the beach and enjoyed the silence and sun. No volcanic ash in the air I thought.

I moved from Cannes to Milan hoping to get out of Europe. Milan, the fashion capital. I was greeted by Prada, Gucci, Furla, you name it but nothing excites me. All I want was to go home to my son and hubby. I remembered consoling a 40++ year old colleague - she was very upset to stay in a funky hotel! Yes, it was funky - imagine red lights along the corridor, black doors with graffiti and a huge orange bed at the lift lobby!

Still stuck in Europe, I had to get out. I looked at every possible flights and city that I could fly out from. Even thought of taking the cruise from Rome to Athens to get out. I got a call from Amloyd informing me there was a flight out of Milan but boss was against the idea of me traveling on economy. At that moment, I don't care. I just want to go home. I was upset but decided to just hang on. I finally got out of Europe via Rome. The 10hrs bus ride from Milan to Rome was back breaking and the minute SQ took off, I turned to my boss and told her I was going to cry. I felt my body relaxed and slept for the next 12hrs!

2010 is a very stressful year at work. Because of the short financial year, there were so many things that needed to be done. And because I was preggie, I need to finish so many things before I go on maternity leave. I remembered working on budgets and some other new business developments projects in May. I got up every morning at 4am to start work and since hubby was away, I thought I could go on like that. The day I submitted all my work, it was the same day hubby got home. The next morning at 4am, my water bag leaked and we made our way to hospital. Mom was crying when I left Baby Abang with her, hubby was very quiet throughout the trip and I had too many what ifs in my head. It was the most scary moment in our lives. In KKH I was restless. I remembered asking hubby if the hospital has wifi and he glared at me. He even refused to charge my BB for me. I deserved it. I was also concerned for mom because my elder brother was getting married the following week. I was supposed to help her with the wedding preparations and I added more stress on her. I was on hospitalization leave for 2 weeks. And if that is not all, I slipped and fell on my bump when I sent Baby Abang to school.

Everything was good until we got to end of July when Baby Abang caught HFMD. Like any parents, we were worried, what more I was due in 2 weeks. Abang was cranky, lost a lot of weight, thankfully still active.

I had a staff who resigned when I was on maternity leave. I think he did that to spite me. But he said he's going because he was offered better moolah. Good for him. I can now start bringing in a new blood and get new ideas going. Change is the only constant thing in life and one has to embrace change. If you cannot do that, then please go and not hinder others. I still have not found a replacement for him. Sometimes what you really want may not necessarily be what others want.

Just before I got back to work, mom sprained her arm and could not carry Baby Adik. Mon-in-law had to go for an operation and was not allowed to carry anything. I can't remember much but all I know is things worked out well for us and it's already been a month.

I've learnt from 2010 and am thankful for my family, friends, colleagues and most importantly my hubby. You know how stubborn and fiercely independent I can be and yet you continue to have that patience for me.

I want 2010 to end and I look forward to 2011. I pray that 2011 will be a smoother year for me. InsyaAllah.

Hot Topic

Since we moved to Lorong Chuan, the topics of conversation revolves around food, the location and how much our lives have changed. Our weekends are sacred - that precious time we have, we want to sleep in, spend time with family, friends but now, we wake up early on Sat to run our errands. We've been charged with late payments - phone bills, etc. We have to ensure we have enough money in our wallet because there is no ATM machine in our building! I have $80 in my purse for the longest time and it has been like that for many weeks. But when the weekend comes, I spend more - on food and things that I don't usually buy when our office was in town.

I still have not figured out how and when I can squeeze in some time to exercise and doing my errands on weekdays. I need to figure out how to do cash transfer online to another bank and figure out what time I need to leave the office to get to the nearest mall - I don't want to wait in the queue for that parking lot. So many changes and adjustments and I have not even shared with you changes from a professional front and physically!

While it can be hilarious listening to colleagues and friends talking about adjustments and the experiences they get when they go to the neighbourhood malls, it also made me realize how spoilt some of us are... me included.

Year 2010 has been nothing but changes and challenges and yes, some good moments. It's 28 days to end of the year... and while I can continue to moan and groan, I have to snap out of it and embrace these changes and challenges.

VW GTI, I Heart You

I got a taste of GTI on Thursday last week - and took that opportunity to drive to Adam Road for lunch. The feeling was orgasmic. It was a blast to drive. The car has a strong engine, is stable and definitely has oomph!

A few months ago, when I was looking for a car to buy, that was one car that I deliberately kept away from. I knew if I had gone ahead to test drive it, I would have bought it. If I had done that, it was simply because I gave in to temptation. I know hubby would be very happy because he had always wanted to get a GTI. Being practical helps, I moved away from all VW cars!

So when Chris offered his keys to me, how could I resist? I just had to get behind the wheel and feel the surge as I step on the accelerator. Do I want to get a VW next? The answer is no. I am saving for that dream car next.

Ready, Get Set, Go!

I went back to work today - I took 3 months maternity leave and will definitely take that Friday off for the next 20 weeks!

I have to admit, I was very excited. First day back at work, first day in the new office, first day driving a new route to work, first day dropping Irfan off at nenek's place. I couldn't sleep the night before. Each time I opened my eye, the first thing I looked at was the clock. At 530am when my alarm went off, I was on the go go go!

Straight to kitchen to prepare breakfast and dinner. Yes dinner. I was supposed to be on a conference call tonight and do not want to take it at nenek's place - because that would mean Abang, Abah and Adik will be home really late. So I decided to prepare dinner. It was chicken curry, fried vegetables and fishball soup for Abang. I had everything planned, down to what happens if Irfan cries on the way to nenek's place. Contingency plans in place. The only thing that was not finalized was the route to take to office. I decided to go via AYE-CTE and made it to work at a decent time.

Day 1 done. Day 2 tomorrow - need to find time to exercise in the morning. I realized tonight that whatever time I have in the evenings will be for the kids and later Abah. No night runs for now.

Conversation with Abang

Abang: Mama, are we going out today?
Mama: We are not. It is raining.
Abang: We can still go mama. I tell you. Abah take the car and we go under the shelter to wait.
Mama: huh?
Abang: We wait at shelter Mama, not wet and then get in the car. Can right Mama?

Baby Abang & Baby Adik

When I was pregnant with Irfan, Adli refused to be called Abang. He always addressed himself as Baby Abang and insisted that adik will be called Baby Adik. He would throw tantrums if anyone called him Abang. It was tough to convince him to change his mind.

Despite being toilet trained, he wanted to put on his diaper when he is with us at home. He claimed that if he wore his underpants, he would be an Abang and he wants to continue being the baby. We gave in - simply because I was tired of having to deal with a crying boy. I prayed hard and hope that he would change.

When Adli met Irfan for the first time, he was shy but came forward to kiss Baby Adik. Interestingly, he addresses himself as Abang when Adik cries and when he talks to his younger brother. Today he says diapers are for babies and he does not need one. He still wants to be cuddled like a baby but will only do so when Adik is asleep or playing on his own. When I asked Adli if he is still a baby, he said "Yes! But I am a Big Baby!"

Home Maker, Mom & Career Woman

I've enjoyed the last 3 months as a home maker and fulltime mom. I enjoyed seeing my baby grow, listening to my elder son's stories about school, his friends and playing with his imaginary toys, listening to hubby telling me about his work - everything.I'm happy to spend time preparing dinner and watching SEDAP almost every evening to get some interesting recipes to try. I made desserts - brownie, pulut serunding, serawa, naga sari... food that hubby and son love. I read and surf the internet. I met with gfs and kept abreast of industry and office developments. I spent time with mom and listening to mom's stories. I started exercising - and now I could run again. Today it took me 16mins to run 2km. Not great but it's a good start. I spent time by myself, to reflect and think of my next steps and plan for my future.

And I think I have enough of all of that. Now I want to go back to work. I want to get caught in traffic in the morning. I want to wake up early and enjoy the silence as I prepare breakfast for my boys and get my adrenalin running at 6am. I want to dress up, put on my make up and do my hair. I want to change my bags everyday and wear all those shoes in the storeroom!

Will I miss being a full time mom? No but I will definitely be very happy to take on that mom and home maker role every evenings, the weekends and public holidays.

What a Waste!

We were told we could take some office furniture home. I was in the office last evening to take some drawers and shelves – not for me but for my brother and sister-in-law. A few weeks back, they mentioned they wanted to get some furniture for their bedroom so timing was perfect.

I have to admit, there were a lot of furniture that are in good condition. The shelves and cupboards in my boss’s room were built like 7 months ago. Everything is so new and I was told that it will be destroyed. We are getting Helen Miller chairs in the new office – yes, each chair is about $1K and yet in the current office, we have so many other chairs that are still usable.

I remembered when we had our first office move meeting – we wanted to save as much furniture as we can and re-use our chairs. I don’t know what happened in July, all that changed. Now, in the new office, we are getting new chairs, new furniture, new microwave, new fridge – everything is new! I have not been to the new office but I do get an office reno update very often with pictures attached.

I asked our HR VP who was with me, why we didn’t auction off our stuff – or even organize Garage Sale. Monies collected can either go to charity or to staff welfare. She said something about the quotations that she received and they were not so great.

What?! It’s better than not getting anything at all.

Goodbye The Atrium, Hello Lorong Chuan!

Yes we are moving. We are joining HBO and ESPN at Lorong Chuan.
I was part of the office move committee and this was definitely not my choice. The building reminds me of Bestway Building and the office space had a weird smell. One of my colleagues did not like it either but when she saw the tennis court, that worked for her. I wanted an office in the East - closer to hubby and we even planned to move to the East to cut traveling time in the morning!

I said 'goodbye" to our office in Atrium at the end of July. In fact, I said goodbye to many things - convenience, shopping malls, Starbucks and yes that prata cafe downstairs! I am not a fan but when you are pressed for time, you just have to go downstairs to grab food. I'll be saying hello to canteen food - and I think I may get up early to prepare lunch.

I saw an email this morning regarding the office move - the critical dates, the standard message to use in our "out of office" response and suddenly I wish I am in the office to experience the chaos. The last time we moved out of Temasek Towers, the whole office was a mess, we had a party - streamers, paints, shredded paper strewn everywhere! I wonder if the same would happen here at the Atrium.
The email also wanted HODs to be in the office by 830am - (yeah right), the MD to send a welcome note between a certain time and the first phone rings at 9am. I bet it's all because of Fengshui - we did engage a Fengshui Master to determine where a HOD sits and what to avoid. I remembered HR asking HODs for their DOB - some did not give and I am one of them. One of my colleagues who gave her DOB was told to remain single and forget about getting married! How depressing is that?!

1st Nov - a new chapter kicks in for us all. And for me that would be Nov 9 when I'm officially back in office!

At Home and Bored

We are never satisfied. I have been on leave since last week July. The first week was to after Baby Abang and was very domesticated. The 9th day, I had enough. I went back to the office the day Baby Abang went back to school.I think if I continued to stay home I would be very angry at everything. I went back to the office on Tues. I enjoyed the company, the work and being at my desk! I'm such a loser! I know!!!

Today I decided to stay home.
I am doing work from home. I have read so many books and magazines, surf the net and even rented DVDs - I think I have watched 4-5 movies in 1 week. Of coz some of the movies are Japanese and Korean. A girlfriend commented - Korean again (like my first pregnancy) - yeah. The difference is the first one is Korean drama, the second is Korean movies :P

3 more days.... and a whole new chapter begins :)

More Challenges Before I Pop!

I thought I could spend the last week of my pregnancy at home - by myself most importantly, catch up on sleep, read and just chill. Baby Abang is down with HFMD today. Yes, HFMD. On the same day, I developed sore eyes. Baby Abang has been grouchy for the longest time - in fact since I was in my second trimester but this time round, he is such a grouch I have to keep my hands closely to myself. My hubby on the other hand, has so much patience, it's amazing how he does that. Alhamdullilah for that. Seeing how cool he is, I have to put in a lot of effort to stay cool too. That has not been easy.

I hope this is the final challenge during my pregnancy period. I hope I have become a better person with all these and insyaAllah whatever more challenges there are coming my way, insyaAllah, i'll get through it.

Countdown is always a countdown and it begins now!

Hear the Tiger Roar!

I walked into the meeting room for HOD meeting and my boss exclaimed - "Wah! You are so big already! When is your EDD again?" Told her and somehow in the conversation she said, I don't see a lot of pregnant women these days. Told her I disagree. She said Chinese do not like having a Tiger daughter for many reasons. We then went into an interesting discussion. In the end she asked "Why ah? You Tiger is it?" I said "yep" and she ended saying "There! I rest my case"

I walked right into it.

The Last Lap

I'm in my 8th month now. Other than feeling extremely tired, I think I am beginning to walk like a sloth too - slowly pushing my legs forward. I am in bed on most nights by 10pm - with Baby Abang and will be wide awake from 2am t0 4am. Half the time I'll be contemplating whether I should go online and do work or surf the net but I keep telling myself I need to relax and let my mind rest. I end up either praying or watching TV - like hantu TV alone in the living room.

At work I am still fiesty and thrive with all the stress. I know I have a deadline to meet and yet I continue looking forward to getting the work done. I have to admit also that I am worried - so much to do - can finish or not and of course having to deal with some colleagues who just do not want to do their jobs is infuriating!

I remembered when I was pregnant with Baby Abang - I was a lot more energetic, jovial, carefree, singing and watching Korean drama and crying while watching it. I loved that feeling.

With Baby Adik, I am fiesty, fast tempered, too practical, fierce/ stern and half the time don't tolerate to any nonsense. I do like listening to dance music too and am anal about keeping the house tidy! People ask me - do you have any cravings with this one - the answer is no - just like the first. Have I gained a lot of weight? 8 months pregnant and I've gained 10.5kg - just like the first one - not bad. The only difference is, my craving is a clean, tidy house! With baby Abang,I watched too much TV!

Every pregnancy is different and I have to agree. Have I enjoyed the journey? Yes I have. It has been a challenging one - one episode every 2 months and the last one in June was a real scare and post that incident, I do take extra caution. Despite all that, I love seeing the changes my body goes through (except my butt!!! urgh but all prep for giving birth!) I'll live with it but I do hope to be a "hot mama" in the future! We shall see!

I Betrayed My Nokia

I am a very loyal person - loyal to friends, to family, to colleagues, company and brands. I have been using Nokia phone from Day 1 - that was many years ago. I remembered once buying a Motorola mobile phone and that courtship was only 3 months. It was back to Nokia again.

Last Friday, hubby was adamant that I get my iPhone. He's been persuading me for the past 3 months or more and I have been reluctant. Practically everyone uses iPhone now and I do not want to be one of them. I succumbed and left everything to hubby to manage. I had to decide on the color - black or white, I chose black and insisted on a Fuschia Pink cover. He went round VivoCity looking for that cover. On second thoughts I should have insisted on a bling bling iPhone cover.

It's been 3 days and I am not a convert... yet. I finally read the manual and went online to read more about the phone and the applications. This morning I got really excited - that was at 5am (!) and I will definitely continue reading on iPhone tonight. Hope I can stay awake till late.

I guess I do not have a choice now. I just have to learn to use the phone and slowly love this new phone. Hubby will definitely not carry an iPhone, what more one with a Fuschia pink cover. He told me I am on my own and he will get a HTC phone. Wonder what his agenda is for getting me an iPhone. I guess I will have to wait and find out.

Milan to Rome to Singapore

The Milan office was great. My colleagues welcomed us with open arms and helped us through with everything - from meeting rooms to flights to restuarants and where to shop! What more can we ask for?!

I received a call from SQ informing me that they are gathering all their passengers and we were to leave for Rome on Monday evening at midnite on a bus. My boss and I left for the airport at 11pm and I have to say, when I got to Milan airport, everyone was very sombre. Perhaps it was late night. Got our boarding passes and on the double decker bus we go. I felt like the Vontrap family (not sure if the spelling is right but from the movie Sound of Music) leaving the country quietly and in the dark.

The bus journey was long - 9 hrs! Back breaking and not a great situation to be in for a pregnant woman. I tried to sleep and gave up in the end. Managed to see the sunrise in Italy and it was beautiful. Gosh, I traveled through Italy! Who would have thought?

The airport in Rome was chaotic. People were pushing, trying to get out and get in line. Lucky we managed to get our boarding pass sorted quickly. Then rushed to the VAT station to get our tax refund sorted. Gosh, the queue was long but did it anyway.
Finally got on the relief plane and made it home safely this morning - Alhamdulliah.

I have to admit that I hated the situation I was in - just the uncertainties of it all. Lucky I had colleagues with me and the blackberry we get constant updates from other colleagues who are stuck in other parts of Europe - each giving encouragement. Colleagues in UK called and emailed us often to make sure that we are all fine and yes, the social network Facebook is helpful too!

There are instances too where I feel that I should have just moved on with it but someone was against it... i shall keep that behind because ultimately, I made it home - safe and my family is relieved.

Cannes to Milan

Emirates called to say that our flight to Dubai is cancelled and off we go to Milan in a car. Mercedez Benz.. with a driver who got us into Milan safely and he took only 3hrs. Not bad.

The car costs us Euro 1400 and I have to admit, I was comfortable. We are staying in this hotel called Nhow - a very groovy, MTV like, stylized hotel. Not sure how I feel about it but I am not particularly picky - as long as the bed and toilets are clean, I am completely fine. I had to console my 44 year old colleague who just cried and cried when she got into the hotel. She hated it as it was too groovy for her. I don't blame her. There is a red wall in your room and the corridors are so dark - it makes us feel like we are in a prison cell!

I have never been to Milan and coming from Cannes and into Italy, the difference in country, people, language, culture is a huge difference! I'm in the fashion capital and there are just so many brands/ designs to look at! My goodness. I went into the oldest shopping mall - right now I cannot remember what it's called and they have Gucci, Miu Miu, Chloe - all my fav brands lined up next to each other. I was in awe.

I saw the famous Dumou Di Milano, it took my breathe away.

I do have some time tomorrow. No point crying in the hotel room and stressing out over flights routes, I should just enjoy being in Milan and continue to pray that all goes well and i get home soon. Meanwhile, Dumou, see you tomorrow! Will spend time there during lunch hour. Will be working in the Milan office.

Ciao!

Complacency or Just Plain Stupid

I got a earful from the Jules, our programming head today over dinner.
He could not believe that whatever route I am looking at now with our travel agent, I was also looking at costs. I am not the only one, my colleague from Oz does the same and when I spoke to the other Singaporeans who are here, they too are concerned with costs!

Jules stared at me and Deirdre (from Oz) in disbelief and kept reminding me the company will pay for all the travels and accommodation. He said, we are both stupid to keep thinking of how much this whole episode would cost us.

I also think because of our mind set, we look at various flight route out of Europe. If only I had thought of Dubai or Doha or Istanbul first, I would have been home already. Oh well. It's done.

We met today to find a Plan B - if our flights get canceled tomorrow, we will be on our way to Milan. Human Resources have been contacting us and wants us to be in one place and the best solution is to get to Milan by car (5hrs drive from Nice) and stay in Milan for the next few days and work from the Milan office.

Apparently the airport in Milan is also closed but will open by Weds/ Thurs. We'll see.

Again I am thankful that I have a great boss and colleague to see me through. If I have been on my own, I would be very much affected by this whole adventure.

Ash Weekend

It's been 3 days and more flights are cancelled.
I was supposed to leave for Zurich this morning, the flight was cancelled last evening.

While I am still optimistic and continue to look at various options to leave this beautiful French Riveria, I am telling myself to accept whatever that comes my way. I am disappointed - you may wonder why. I've been here more than 15 times - so I have seen enough. The Europeans love the sun, drinking champagne by the beach and enjoying the sea view. While I love being in the sun and the cold wind, I need to be occupied and doing some things. Shopping is out of the question now - things are not cheap and I have packed. And I miss my family back home.

I had a good time last evening with my colleagues from UK and Australia. I am really blessed to know them and knowing that we care for each other. Our programming head for all Nick channels was up all night sorting out various routes/ flights for all his programming members. He was adamant I stay put and not try my luck via Frankfurt. Frankfurt air traffic is now closed.
My UK colleagues left this morning at 3am - car ride to Paris and later on Eurostar train to London. Hope all goes well on their end.

This experience is just so surreal. I'm sure when we meet again next time we'll be talking about our experience and be thankful that all are well.

I don't know my next destination at the moment - latest update - Rome air traffic is now closed.

Stranded in the French Riveria

I've been awake since 3am this morning - in Cannes.
My 6am flight to Amsterdam was cancelled and Schipol airport is closed. Apparently all airports in North of Europe will be closed for the next 48hrs.

For the past 3 hrs, I have been on the phone looking for various routes out of Nice. Munich, Barcelona, Zurich, Frankfurt. The last one is the best option - there are 3 flights a day from Frankfurt to Singapore on a daily basis. Chances of getting on a flight there is higher.

In my hotel room now, I have been glued to BBC - I should change channels right but everything is in German/ French and I'd rather watch BBC. It's pretty depressing knowing that thousands of flights are being cancelled and thousands more are stranded in airports. I know several people who are stranded in Schipol.

I was so looking forward to going home - back to hubby and my son. My lil one has been unwell for the whole week and hubby has been tired staying up on most nights as the lil one is coughing. It makes a lot of difference to hear the small one sings on the phone - still cheerful and playful.

I keep taking to my lil one in my tummy - and busying myself with work. Some friends who are still here suggests a day trip to Monaco or Grasse but I'll pass. I've been to both places many years ago and my mind is set on going home only.

One step at a time. An interesting ride ahead.

Second Pregnancy

I am 5 months into my second pregnancy already and I have been on long haul flights twice. There is another one next month and I don't think I will be able to get through that. It's Los Angeles and I saw one of the itinerary - American Idol show! I know!

I have to admit, the second pregnancy is unlike the first one. I am a lot more tired, fatter (I think) though many friends, colleagues and distributors do not agree with me. It does take a lot of mental strength to tell myself that I can get through all the meetings scheduled during the week. I cannot believe it's only Tuesday - I feel like I have been here ages already!

I'll get through for sure...I just need to learn to acknowledge that I am tired and listen to my body.

A Scary Episode

My hubby fainted on me last Sunday.. at the carpark.
He is currently on crutches - stretched ligament.
Before he passed out, he told me he could not see a thing, he eyes turned white and off he goes.
I had him leaning on my body and holding on to my lil one... calling my brother and sister for help.
The only thing I wanted to do was cry then - I didn't. Luckily, the whole episode lasted for like 5mins and he was conscious again.
I blame it on the medicine that the doc gave him - we were at NUH Emergency Unit on Sunday.

I am supportive of hubby's interests and usually let him do what he likes. Right now, I feel like telling him to STOP playing soccer. I've had a few scares already - acute chest pains, fractured finger, now the ligament. The fainting incident tops it all. I won't tell him now - he is short fused because of the pain and being immobile but will tell him later when he starts walking on his own and becomes his usual self.

Have a Little Faith

If you have not read this book by Mitch Albom, I recommend you do so.

But my blog today has nothing to do with the book I read but my recent exeperience on a flight to Jakarta.
We were hit by a turbulence - nothing new but what annoyed me most was there were Indonesian ladies, screaming and holding on to each other tightly. As a result, I teared... and I blame that on those women! I can be void of emotions at times and I have to admit this experience did affect me.

While I prayed that all of us will get off the plane safely, I wished I could tell those women to stay calm and pray. What do you get when you scream? You irked other passengers and it's not as if the birds could help you or the cloud could cushion your fall.

Have a little faith - regardless what your religious beliefs are. It helps when you pray.

Deja Vu

This week has been a tough week - mentally, physically and emotionally demanding.
Started off the week knowing the fate of some of my colleagues. Deja Vu.

It's done. I have a headache and all I want now is to leave the office soon.

Challenges

A girlfriend recently told me I am living in denial.

Perhaps I refuse to acknowledge stress. Stress do exist I'm sure but I prefer to say that I am challenged and not stress. I take on each challenge and will always find a solution to each situation. It gets mentally tiring and some times it gets emotionally draining. I don't think I can ever stop finding a solution to situations - I guess I am so used to that thought process, it just comes naturally.

2010 - A Year of Changes

My lil one goes to a full daycare/ nursery on Monday. That's a big event for us all and changes to our daily routine begins.

He now needs to get dressed and have breakfast before he goes to school.... which probably means my morning "me" time is no longer mine. I may have to get up at 530am now:)

I cannot work long hours or late - have to leave the office by 630pm at the latest and that's a huge change! I cannot remember the last time I left office that early!
I guess I'll continue working from home when the lil one goes off to bed.

I'm getting another maid for mom. Yes, my heart aches each time I hear her tell me how tired she is from doing housework and how quiet the house is when my 2 brothers are not home!

InsyaAllah (God's willing), my elder brother is getting married this year. He seems really serious with this one. Good for him.

And.. InsyaAllah we can start calling the lil one "Abang" and then everything changes!

Asset Management

Mom informed me on Tuesday morning that she has been shortlisted for umrah in 2010. From the shortlisted, only 10 will be chosen and she could be the lucky one. All she needs to do is to go down to Singapore Shopping Center to register. She then asked me, how to get there.

I brought her there. Despite telling her it is a waste of time, she insisted on being there and registering. Of course, there is a catch.... she has to sit through a 1hr asset management talk before she could register.

I was annoyed and it was no secret. These are the reasons why I don't trust them and told them so;
- why would I want to put thousand of dollars in a company that is only 2 years old and claimed that they have done many businesses in developing country - focusing on India. They then showed us some of the projects that they are involved in... in 2 years they've built that? hmmm...

- when asked, where is their source of revenue/ income, what is their profit like, who is their parent company... - no one could answer. They sent 4 officers to me (!!) to answer my question. And not one could give me an answer

- their board of directors are made up of ex soccer player, musician.... eerrr... no offense but what would they know about asset management?! what more in the developing countries. Not credible

- Their PR manager is a Chef and you have seen him on TV. He thinks he is a celebrity.. he wore a white suit... and trying to sell me the company! Get serious.

So I finally asked them why should I put my money in your company and not a reputable Islamic Bank? They could not respond. And with that we left.

Mom is lucky she has her kids to talk to before making any decisions. What happened to other old people who live on their own or has no one to consult to? They may think that they could make the additional 10K or more by investing and who knows might end up losing that money?

Third Time Unlucky

Some people say, all unlucky things happen in 3s. I guess this time round, it's true.

I sent my 3rd maid back to the agency yesterday. Yes, my third. Since Tutik left in July, I had 3 maids - each lasted for about 6-8 weeks. The last one - 2 weeks.
Each time I sent a maid back, I'll analyse every single situation - could it be me, my mom, the workload or the maid?!!

The first one was hardworking, but she's too smart to my mom's liking. When mom commented on her work, she'll give mom her opinion and will pull a face. We decided to send her back.

The second one is in her own world. We called her "hantu dapur" and will stay in the kitchen all the time. When you speak to her, she just stares at you and walk off. Very bizarre. I sometimes wonder what she's thinking off. Mom had enough because mom ended up doing most of the housework while she stayed in the kitchen. She did not cook - mom does the cooking. She finds comfort hiding in the kitchen we feel.

The final one.... she's full of pretenses and is a smartass. She will do well when you stand to look, the minute you walk away, she does a half ass job. Most frustrating example, I told her to clear the dishes after dinner. She did, and instead of washing the dishes, she used my dish cloth to clean the bowls! I was so lost for words! And she takes 3 hrs to iron 12 pieces of clothes!!!

Yesterday, mom called crying. Chest pains from stress. The maid decided to pull on a long face - because I reprimanded her the day before. I sent her back within 4hrs.

Now I am maidless again. Yes, I do not need a maid. I took a maid to accompany mom - that was the only reason. With the lil' one, having a maid to help mom out was necessary. Luckily for us, my lil one is off to daycare/ nursery on Jan 4th.
Mom looked so much happier this morning.

Next, I'll just get a part time helper to come on weekends and help mom with her housework.

Ask and You'll Get It?

I hope.

I have been asking for the past 2 years - each time during our performance review.
Not so much for myself - but for the team.
This time, I said my team is like the battered wife - kena pukul and yet continue to stay with the marriage.

I've learnt to ask from my non-Singaporean colleagues. Perhaps that explains why they get richer each year and live a lavish lifestyle. I'm usually happy with what I get and since I am not a money person, I take whatever increment and salary readjustment that comes my way. And I know I cannot assume that my team members are like that - but they seem like that because they never ask.

Let's hope this time round we get what I ask for. Pray pray pray.

Big & Bulky

Kris Kringle Theme for today.

And what a nice surprise!

My secret pal -i'll give you a big kiss!

Kris Kringle

Day 2 - Meet my Fuzzy & Hairy Friends.
They greeted me this morning :)

Day 3 - Two of my favorite colors. Delivered by my not favorite man in the office.
It made my day though. How sweet.
Secret Pal - I think I know who you are. Very sweet definitely not sour.

Kris Kringle

It's so fun. We are playing Secret Santa/ Pal with some of our colleagues.
There is a theme everyday and today it's brown and warm.
I saw brownies, cupcakes, sandwiches on my colleagues' tables.
I received a card - with pictures of very cute puppies and Peanut Character. Very sweet. I think the sender is telling me that he/she likes dogs, own dogs. Who can it be??? So many colleagues here love dogs.

Tomorrow's theme is Fuzzy or Hairy. Someone said he needs to shave tonight!!
Too bad I will not be in the office to see colleagues reactions tomorrow.

Klacid - I Hate You

I am on Klacid. It is an antibiotic.
It makes me super hungry and super tired.
And because of that, I cannot concentrate and cannot work!
For the past 2 days, I have been eating a LOT!
And I still have to take Klacid for another 3 days.
Oh dear. Tomorrow is Eid.
Lots of food.
No bootcamp on Sat.
Habislah Aku (I'm dead)

A Meeting to Remember

I was asked to attend a meeting with one of the telco's companies here in Manila.
We met with the President and he brought along the MD of the company we are working with.
I have to admit, fine dining and meeting top executives make me nervous. But as I listened to the conversation and started making follow up notes, the meeting was entertaining.From work to personal life to scandals and who's who in the top.

I have to say - I could be wrong here but from what I've observed, Filipinos are very driven by emotions and egos and many decisions are made that way. They are very passionate people and this translates to their jobs. I was at a table during breakfast when I witnessed a very respectable and charismatic man's eyes welled-up and his face turned red. I was speechless and had to look away, in case I too cried.

Over lunch, other than work and politics and the various businesses they are in and who is connected to whom, I'm embarrassed to be in a conversation where these men talked about the scandals that they choose to have openly. I don't know how my lady boss could tolerate all these and continue to humor them.

Can I make the assumptions that most men at the top are like this? I have heard of many such stories and to be part of the whole conversation make it look real.

But I still believe there are men out there who are clean and faithful to their wives and kids.

Feeling Sick

I feel like throwing up.
I have had this feeling since 3pm - post lunch.
No. I am not pregnant - not yet.
This has nothing to do with being preggie. I'm feeling this way because I had lunch in a typical Filipino restaurant. I don't like the smell - it's oily, fishy - it just makes you sick.
And to be eating local food - I would rather starve.
I've been drinking warm water and eating fruits - i want to cleanse my mouth and my stomach if possible.

That's one of the many reasons why I don't like to go to Manila for business; holiday, no way!
Filipinos like their food to be oily, fatty and porky! yucks.Just the thought of it is making me sick all over again.

I finally know how Crispy Pata looks like now - it's actually pork knuckles- fried!

Can you understand now why I feel this way?!

Mabuhay Imelda Marcos

We saw her at the hotel lobby last night.
She is one very tall lady.
Very elegant, looks amazing and gentle.
She smiled at practically everyone.
Our eyes were glued to her - we followed her every single movement. We were admiring her elegance. And I was told, she is in her 70's. Wow.

Shampoo Boy

I had to get my hair trimmed - it's been 3 weeks already. The last one I did was in KL - on impulse and I liked the stylist.

Today, I had the same urge and walked into a hair saloon for a trim. I knew I was getting a male stylist and I am fine with that. I did not expect to get a male person to shampoo my hair. He looked tough - bulky and muscular - the image of him shapooing my hair was just wrong. I had conversation with myself; is he gay? if he is, how come he is not gentle? ouch that's my ear, don't dry my ear! Stay away from me.

What freaked me out when he put his hands on my shoulders and started massaging. I went completely stiff. I guess I must have looked really shocked because he stopped immediately and told me to relax.

Walauwey! Never again.

Malam Lagenda with Tok Pah

I went for her concert at Singapore Indoor Stadium.
It felt strange because I don't really know her songs and even more strange when I heard my mom singing along to almost ALL her songs! I felt like I was in 2 concerts -Tok Pah and one for Nani Jo. But it was a good evening. I truly enjoyed all her songs - some I have heard on the radio while helping mom in the kitchen :) and of course the company.

I have to say that Sharifah Aini is blessed with most versatile vocals; her voice is so powerful that you get goose-bumps and tingles at the same time.

Bootcamp

My colleague suggested I join her on Sat morning for an exercise bootcamp. I took on her offer and went to East Coast Park. I don't know what to expect but I was told that if I follow instructions and put my heart and soul into doing the exercise, I could get rid of 1000 calories in 1hr. Not bad. If I were to go on the treadmill and run in the gym, I would have lost only 300 calories!

I did not expect to see a big group - there were about 20 of us and 3 instructors! Of that 20, I have 5 other colleagues with me - that was good. The exercise routine were tolerable - we had to do push ups, crunches, shuttle runs, squats - I felt good - the pace was good and everyone in the group motivated each other. I spoke to a lady from Holland and she has been following the bootcamp for 4months. She said she has lost 7kg! Not bad eh.

I survived the bootcamp. No aches, no pains just tired, super thirsty and very hungry - after the session and throughout the day.

Will I make it to next Saturday? God-willing I will!

On the road

I have been away from my family for about 13 days now. I got home for a few days and left off again.
My lil one chooses his Abah over me and I spend the first few hours at home cuddling and playing with him - so he knows, Mama is still around.
My hubby when I told him I have to travel again, was clearly not happy but is supportive - and I appreciate that. Who could blame them, I have been away for a while.
I dare not tell them of my upcoming trips - Manila, KL (again) and possibly Hong Kong.

You see, if you think a jet setting life is interesting, it is not. It can get depressing. When I was single and new to the job, I was super happy with the traveling that I get to do. I took time to also check out the cities I visited.
But 1 year into the job, I realized the following:

- I aged a lot faster
- My mom has aged a lot more - i know she was worried and she continues to worry
- My friends are frustrated with me as it is difficult to meet up and chat
- I miss my friends' kids birthdays (!) not good
- I spend a lot of money - on so many things!
- I am now used to a particular lifestyle - so when I go on a holiday, I become super choosy with hotels
- On vacation, when I reach the airport all I want to do is take my luggage and get out
- I buy facial products that promises no fine lines and dark eye rims

10 years into the job and now that I am a wife and a mom, I am going through the following:

- I aged even more and am thinking of getting La Mer for my skincare! scary thought that is!
- I have to spend more time exercising - so that my body could detox and my metobolism rate increases and I am burning fats while at rest and my skin is supple so - I want to look younger! hahahah
- I have to deal with crappy TV shows in hotel rooms
- I sometimes talk to myself in the room - like "where did I leave that bla bla.. or, this show is really bad!"
- It can get very lonely
- I call home often and spend lots of $$ on phone bills. Call hubby, son and mom.
- I spend time chatting online with friends and on FB
- I spend time people watching - in cafes, in massage parlour, in restaurants, in car, in hotel lobby

Short travels are fine. Long ones like this, makes me write such stuff on the blog and my mind wanders to all over the world and place. And when that happens, I can't sleep and the next day, I am super cranky.

A memorable trip to Cannes

Yes, this is a yearly affair but I have to admit that there are so many firsts for this trip.

My first stay in a 5 star hotel on the Croisette. The last few trips, I shared an apartment with my colleague from Korea.

My first Tom Yum Maggi Noodle - no shame asked a friend to cook it for me

For the first time, I went to bed at 845pm - too tired. I usually stay out till quite late.

I saw Jerry Seinfeld and Joan Rivers.

My first private dinner in a very nice hotel suite in Carlton. Very chic and cheeky when some of my colleagues got drunk! Pure entertainment. It was a great evening :)

My first encounter with a very vulgar program distributor. He manages Eastern Europe from a company we acquire content from. He has something against every nationality!

No impulse purchase. It took me 2 days to make a decision on that Louis Vuitton bag! I don't do such things.

The Wheels on the Car

I have to share this story.

The little one did not want to sit with me in the back seat last Sat and insisted on sitting next to Abah. As we approached the traffic junction, I told him that the lights are green and he knows that green means go. The conversation goes like this after:

Me: "Green means go and Red means stop. We cannot stop the car now."
Lil One: "No. Can stop the car Mama. Turn off the engine!"

Cannes

I am in Cannes this week for MIP. I’ve been here many times and I have lost count.

Each time, it’s a different experience. I have stayed in 2 star hotels, in studio apartments and in an apartment that can fit 7 people! I have also tried staying with a Jewish French family. It was a villa with 10 bedrooms and a small pool. It was a great place to meet people and it felt good to be going “home” after a long day.
Today, it’s another new experience – for the first time, I am an invited buyer and I get to stay for free at one of the hotels along the Croisette. It’s not that I have never stayed in a 5 star hotel, but this is a 5 start hotel that I never thought I would be able to stay in. It’s just so difficult to get on the list – for many reasons – I am not a sales person, I am not from US office and I am not even from senior management.

It really matters who your boss is you know. A boss that has good relationships with the right people at international level brings in a whole range for advantages and this is one of them.

Again, I am grateful at this opportunity.

French Alps

I was on the plane this morning from Frankfurt to Nice. I don’t like seating by the window and this time round, I was assigned to one.

It was an amazing view – the river that cuts across and the French Alps. The snow capped mountains – it was breathtaking.

Subahannallah. Allah is Great.

Kueh Raya

This year, mom said she does not want to bake any cookies nor cakes.
The last time I baked for Hari Raya was 3 years ago, before I gave birth. This year, all I want to bake is brownies. Surely, I cannot give her just that right?

So I have been going around looking for kueh raya. I found a shop in Jurong West that sells really good Raya cookies. This morning, despite the heavy downpour, I went to the shop and bought a few varieties for mom. That was 830am - before I go off to work.

I've just spoken to mom -10mins ago. She sounded so tired. She was telling me about her day and guess what, she spent the afternoon making sugee cookies and wants to do pineapple tart this weekend. She has bought all the ingredients. She said, if she has time, she wants to bake cake lapis. I asked her how come? She said " for si kecik tu lah, lagipun kalau tak buat kek, macam tak best gitu". Ler, so fickle.

Ramadan – A Time to Reflect

This Sat, I will be joining all Muslims around the world to fast. Ramadan is not just about restraining from eating and drinking in the day, it is also about reflection and resisting the less positive behavior such as gossiping, lying and being angry.
I started fasting whenever I can since Rejab and Syaaban – partly to pay back the number of days owed from previous Ramandan and also to prepare myself for the 4 weeks ahead. I didn’t want to be in a situation where it will take me many few days to adjust to the lethargy. I want to be able to just get in it and enjoy the benefits of Ramadan and use this time to reflect and cleanse myself.

To all my Muslim friends – Selamat Berpuasa.

Clinging Lil One

The lil one has been very clinging of late. Yesterday he cried throughout the journey - from home to mom's place. Reason: he did not want to go to nenek's house. It was a stressful 20mins ride.

This morning as we turned into my mom's estate, he cried again. Same thing.
No matter how you reason out with him, he would listen and after a few seconds would still insist on following me to work.

I hope this is just a phase and once he knows he cannot get what he wants, he'll stop.

I think he missed me - afterall I was in JKT for a week last week.

My 2nd Production Experience in Indonesia

Last Thursday, we had our second Indonesia Kids's Choice Awards in Jakarta. I have been on regular calls with the production team since day 1 - when we agreed on the event. And finally the big day. As usual, when I got to the site, a lot of things were work in progress and everything seems to move really slowly. As I sat with the production team and listened to the directions given by the Floor Director, I had confidence that the show will go on smoothly and will be a success.

At 6pm, an hour prior to the event, all the production members/crews and everyone who was involved in making the event happened went into a meeting room and gathered around a small table. On the table, there was a basket of pulut kuning (yellow glutinous rice). I was welcomed to join the group in the gathering session. The MD of the channel made a small speech - thanking everyone, etc, made me do a small speech as well (on the spot)to everyone and then the MD invited one of the senior staff to lead a prayer. That impressed me the most. Regardless of what religion you believe in, we were told to pray that the event will run smoothly and the ratings will be good. As the senior staff (a Muslim) led the prayer, I was so overwhelmed with emotions, i could cry! I have never experienced such a feeling in any event/ productions that I have been involved in. It was so surreal. Once the prayer ended, everyone had a taste of the pulut kuning and off they go to get ready for the big event.

The show went well - the kids went wild and most importantly, the show did bring in really good rating!

Cornered

I'm on business trip and one of the things that I dread most is entertaining - especially post dinner. The night could drag on. Last night was no exception. The intent was to just say hello and call it a night but I was held hostage and had to join them for a drink. A drink can be really LONG!

Our partner brought a friend with him - someone that I was introduced to 13 or 14 years ago during my Mediacorp days. And since then, I have successfully avoided him at whichever country I met him. Last night, no such luck. Imagine the look on his face - thrilled that we finally ended up at the same table! Imagine how I feel?! I was really cursing and swearing and kept looking at my watch and avoided eye contact!

You see, the first impression I had of this guy is not great. I could be rude and give all sorts of adjectives to describe him but let's not go there. I don't feel comfortable next to him and I hate his eyes. And I do hope I don't see him again in the next few days here...and I hope I don't see him again in any other country.

Farewell for Now

Wiji Astutik. 4 years and finally, time to say goodbye.

She is going home to get married – she called me this morning to tell me all is well and she was with her “cowok”. Steady. Cannot go out often she said. “Belum kahwin kak. Tak manis dipandang orang”. Wah. The last time I heard that line was like 10-12 years ago.

She’s been good to us – no major headache except for one hiccup but nothing serious.

Before she left, she apologize and I did the same. But her response was so humble, it was very touching.

Will miss Tutik for sure.

Stuffed

I was watching The Biggest Loser the other day on Hallmark channel. The fitness instructor showed the participants the kind of meal they can prepare during vacation.

I tell you, there are no such things.

We’ve just returned from a short holiday to Langkawi. My lil one who is not usually fussy with food is extremely fussy when he travels. Our 4 days in Langkawi, I visited the golden arch restaurant and KFC – with these 2 restaurants, I do know for sure he would have his meal. Unfortunately for me and hubby, we had to make do with fast food for lunch/dinner. Breakfast was a buffet spread and with the fussy eater, both hubby and myself had to finish most food. The only form of exercise I did was swimming and climbing the 367 steps to the waterfall. Till today, my calf and back hurts.
I brought my gym gear to the office today and I got carried away with work, the next thing I know, it was close to 7pm when I left the office. Urgh. Hate the bloated and stuffed feeling.

I feel like a stuffed beancurd.

Datuk

I was reading an article in Sutra magazines about Datuk in Malaysia. Successful marriages, how to tackle a datuk, places to go to "tangkap" a datuk and how to behave to get Datuk's attention. Oh my goodness, I cannot believe Sutra could feature an article but I guess there are people out there who likes reading such stories.I need to be more open minded I supposed.

I have met several Datuks in my profession. I have met Datuks and their wives, I have also seen Datuks without their wives and Datuks with you know lah! I have yet to meet a Datuk that I can respect, someone who is charismatic and visionary. I'm sure they are if not how would they get "Datukship" right? Then I think the standards set aside is not high.

You see, the Datuks that I have met do not leave very good impressions - they were either too "lembik" and speaks English - very Melayu - nothing wrong there but speed up sikitlah bila bercakap. Need to be poised lah. Or they are "gatal" - they think since they are out of their country, it's OK to be "gatal sikit". And then when they meet a fellow Malay in an omputeh country, they try to be friendly with you and want to take you here and there.

Urgh I'm disgusted.

Grow Up? Never!

My colleagues and I spend a few minutes each day to joke, laugh, gossip and can be rather playful during office hours. Today, is no exception; only thing is, we went to the very extreme of being crazy. We were like monkeys exploring a new discovery, from the way we talk to the way we behave to the way be posed in front of the camera. I laughed so hard until my head aches (I don’t get stitches) and each time I look at the picture, I laughed at it again. Hubby said we behaved like school kids and asked, so when do you do work?!

Maid Issues

These few days I have been listening to all sorts of maid issues – from girlfriends, colleagues, my mom’s friends and let me tell you… I do have maid’s issues too. For the past 4 years, everything was smooth sailing; there were problems but they were all very minor and we let it go. Little did we know that on the last day of her work permit, we received a call from some male foreign worker looking for her! And he works in Singapore! You wonder when they meet when I do not even give her a day off. Long story short, she got a good scolding from mom and myself – we both flipped as this was the last thing we expected of her. Few more weeks and she’s going home. Until then, I just have to stay cool and give her a cold shoulder. I need a few days to be back to my normal self… I hate it when someone breaks my trust.

C.F.T

I received a call today from MOM with regard to the extension of my helper's work permit. We spoke for a fair bit and I have to say she was very polite and provided me with all the answers. She definitely knows her work well. But when I asked for her name, she hesitated. It took her abt 10secs to respond and even then, she just gave me her initials. I wonder why. I had no intent to complain. I wanted to compliment and wanted it to be sincere. I wanted to say "Thank You" and would like to know who I was talking to. I did say thank you in the end and told her she was helpful. I can't help but call her by her initials C.F.T (The first thing that came to mind was Cross Functional Team??) -"Thank you C.F.T, you are very helpful" and we both ended up laughing when we hung up!

GSS - Go! Shop! Sale!

Yes, the Great Singapore Sale is here again! The malls are crowded .. and yes I was part of the crowd! Not to worry, after spending so much moolah at private sales, this time round I shopped for mom. She needed a white handbag so we went round looking. I did steal glances at Gucci, Coach, LV... there are long queues everywhere; I can't help but joined one of the queues to have a peek at what was on sale. Lucky for me, mom did not like any of the designs and we settled for something else.
Will I be back for that sale? I don't think so. While I welcome seeing a crowded mall (good for economy), I don't like the idea of pushing and rummaging through clothes, shoes, etc to get the best buys. I think for the next 6 weeks, I will spend my time reading my latest purchase - The Last Concubine :)

Men & Soccer

We went to Changi Hospital yesterday to visit hubby's friend. He was admitted because he had a mild heart attack while playing soccer. Yes, scary - he had no signs of chest pains, short breath prior to this episode. While playing, he suddenly had this acute pain and left the soccer field immediately. Lucky for him, his wife insisted that he went to the hospital to check - was admitted to ICU for observation and later moved to a HD ward. According to the doctor, if he had not done so, the second episode of an attack could be fatal.

In that same ward, there was another patient with him. Let's call him Mr. A. Mr. A was admitted because of soccer too. He was watching a match between Arsenal and Manchester United. Being a Man U fan, he wanted the team to win the Cup title badly. Each time an Arsenal player dribbled the ball or tried to score a goal, he would get really anxious and started smoking non-stop. At the end of the game, Man U won, and he got warded into the hospital - he had a mild heart attack.

Are Singaporean Malays a Conservative Lot?

I think we are. I know I am.
Where do I even start?
I have met and seen many Malays in my course of work. I have also worked in a Malay environment.
I have observed how Singaporean Malays and our neighbouring country Malays behave. I am not saying that all Malays in the neighbouring country are like that, but I am comparing those that live in the city with our own Malay.
I find that the Malays in our neighbouring country is bolder
- some men have affairs and they parade their women openly when they travel overseas
- they drink and offer drinks openly to other Malays. The first time that happened to me, I was in Cannes. In fact I was being ridiculed for rejecting it. Never mind. My respect for that person went down the drain and today when I meet him (while on business) I don't bother to treat him well like the other Malays do.
- i've been asked to a party by one of them and when I said no, I could feel that they thought I have some kind of disease.
Sometimes I do ask myself; is this really required in your job? I am not bothered if you were to ask non Malays to do whatever but to ask a fellow Malay to do the same? That's just not right.

I spoke to a few Singaporean malay friends who have lived and worked out of Singapore and we all feel the same way. We agreed that we are conservative and deep down we know it's haram.

The Morning Talk Show on NTV7

I sat in my hotel room watching the morning talk show on NTV7 yesterday. The 2 hosts - both male were talking abt how much water was consumed by an individual in Singapore, Hong Kong and Penang. In Singapore, each individual used 157L of water per day last year and in Penang it was 257L of water per individual during the same period. Both agreed, that is a lot of water used. And I think they should have just stopped there. Instead, one of them said "Hey at least we beat Singapore at something - they don't have water anyway and they have to buy from us". Another clown called in and tried justifying why Penang used that much water - it's a tourist city, a port. I just could not believe it. So is Singapore mister and to the 2 hosts, it matters how much water an individual use - we are facing shortage of clean water (people on the Gaza strip needs clean water!) and here you 2 clowns are proud to show how insensitive you can be towards Mother Nature and the world! Guys, you are on TV, you have a responsibility to your viewers. Grow up!

My "LIVE" TV Appearance

I was invited to be a judge for a SuperAnimation Pitch in KL over the weekend. I was informed that the show was broadcast LIVE on Astro Ria on Sunday afternoon.
Yes I was a bit nervous and everything went well. Mom was really excited when she heard this and arranged for a tea session at my Mak Lang's place on Sunday arvo. Mak Lang being Mak Lang, informed some other relies in KL and other parts of Malaysia... not bad I have a fan base already.
While watching the LIVE show, my Pak Lang had to ask "Is she wearing a wig?"!!!! Yeah, I laughed too. You must understand, my relies in Malaysia think I am a minah who wears tudung 24/7!

100% Pure Minah!

Let's admit it. There is a minah in every Malay girl - regardless which part of the world she is living in. Today, I did this test on "How Much Of a Minah are you?" on FB and it turns out I am a 100% minah! Steady ah?!
I thought the description was very apt i.e. I listen to random Malay songs from my mp3 player and my hubby drives and his car radio is tuned in to Ria's 89.7 and if he is alone and out late night, yes, he will be listening to Misteri Jam 12!

So babe and dudes.. gua tengah dengar lagu lagu dari CD Rock Cintan. Amacam? Lu suka?

Victim

It is very tiring managing people who are very much driven by their emotions. They tend to position themselves as the victim of circumstances and at every single stage they think of themselves as the victim. The voice of reasoning can outline everything for them but again, these people tend to relate better to their emotions.
I hope I do not have to deal with such people again in future.

Hit by the Shopping Bug!

So much about $80 per week budget.

It all started with the CP sale in the office and thereafter one sale to another. In the last 2 weeks, I have spent on clothes, a bag, a pair of shoes, more clothes for hubby and son and yesterday - another invitation to another sale! This time round, it was perfume and cosmetics. The perfumes were going at $30-50 per 80-100ml and lipsticks were going at $10-15. I bought for myself, hubby, brother, mom and mom-in-law! How to say No?!
I know I have spent too much already this past 2 weeks and it's time to stop! Last evening I sorted my loot and I just cannot believe what I did. Thank goodness I paid them all in cash.

No more shopping!

Women Drivers!

Yes, I am one of them. But I don't think I drive like one.
I have been driving for the past 2 weeks and within a week, I started swearing behind the wheels. That was me - 8 years ago when I drove to work everyday!
Today, one lady driver pissed me off completely. I was cruising nicely on the extreme right lane when she abruptly cut into my lane and for every 200m she stepped on the brakes! What is freaking wrong with her?! Does she realize that her actions could have caused an accident? Drivers like these should NOT be on the road!

Shopaholic Series

I started reading Sophie Kinsella books in 2006 - I remembered grabbing one of her books at the airport. It was a long haul flight and I fell in love with the way she writes. I think I have read all her books and you can imagine how excited I am when I found out that there is a movie coming out for Confessions of a Shopaholic. Yes, I am watching it with girlfriends this Friday.

Now, I am a little hesistant - as I read her books, I have also imagined the whole scene in my head. What if the movie does not match the image I have created? I don't want to be disappointed.

My $80 per week budget

I want to become richer. I want to keep track of my expenses.
Few weeks ago, I told myself that I have to have a weekly budget. I shared my thoughts with some colleagues and they too wanted to do the same.
For that $80 per week budget, I know I have to change my lifestyle. It's going to be tough initially but I'm sure I can do it. I decided to take small changes and I shall begin with...

1) replacing premium coffee like mocha wiith Kopi no C - yes, possible. Can be done. What did I do? I stopped buying coffee altogether and made my own Nescafe.

2) Tah Pao food from home - yes. done. I have been waking up early for the past few days to prepare lunch for hubby and decided to pack lunch for myself.

3) Collect coupons for any discounts - McD, Carrefour... in case I need to top up food in the drawer in the office.... hahahah..

4) Take public transport... yes done. Take taxi but at non peak hour... I will get to MRT and LRT and feeder buses.

Wish me luck my friends...

Betrayal

I don't like the feeling of being betrayed. I feel resentful, furious, hurt and my trust towards that person just shatters. I cannot believe I actually thought that the person I knew for some time as honest and fair was actually manipulating me to exploit my experiences and talent. It does not help either that recently I found out the plan.

Friends are not easy to make and keep. But once this trust is shattered, no matter how much one tries to rectify the situation, the damage is done. I will move on but for now, let me hate you for what you did.

Frontal Nudity

It irks me to see women post work out session walk around naked in the changing room. I think it is simply rude - regardless whether one has a great body or one's body is covered with layers of fat.
Last Friday, I was waiting in line to go into the shower when this 40 something year old lady decided to stroll in front of me, naked. I can tolerate seeing women's buttocks and back but this woman was happily walking bare bodied. Oh my goodness, what happens to respecting other people's personal space?

I know, if ever someone stands in front of me naked while I'm getting dressed I would do one of the following:
a) smack the person's arse
b) pinch their headlights

Seriously!

Mr SnowMan

My lil one goes to Arts and Music class every Sat. Last week during Arts lesson, he and his friends had to draw, color and build a snowman. I was with him throughout, giving him directions as he put the snowman together. Towards the end, the teacher gave each one of them some cotton wool and told them to paste it on the snowman. Adli got very excited playing the glue and pasting the cotton wool on the snowman. When his Abah came into class to join him, he proudly showed Abah his artwork. He said, " Abah, Snowman Got Janggut!"

No news updates for me - thank you

I am avoiding the newspapers, news channels and online news. Everyday I read depressing stories about how the whole world is going through a recession. Today I read another - Nissan plans to cut 20,000 heads. I know the world is going through a tough time. Our government is doing their best to help everyone in need. Each morning when I read news online, I get very disheartened. Thank goodness I am not a sales person - can you imagine the kind of stress every sales person has to go through? In such tough times, how can you get advertising dollars?!

I hope everyone of us gets out of this recession fast.... for now, I shall settle for news update from the entertainment industry...

Alternatively, I should start reading Malay newspapers... why? The headlines news sometimes can be pretty amusing.

Notorious Traffic

My job requires me to travel and I frequent cities like Manila and Jakarta. In my 8 years, I have missed a flight twice; once becuase I wanted to do my morning prayers first before departing and second because I was lost in Amsterdam's airport (hey their airport is HUGE! and going from one departure hall to another, you have to go through immigration!) and there were a few near misses too.

Last Friday we were in Manila. My colleague and I left for the airport early - in our minds, we'll be able to make it since the office and the airport was not that far. We arrived at the airport 30mins before the scheduled departure time. We jumped out of the car, pulled our luggage and ran as fast as we could to the check in counter! I think we forgot to thank the driver - he was really good though there were situations where I could have had a heart attack. I was prepared to beg the officers if they had refused to take us on. We were very very lucky... SQ counter was still open and we had an immigration officer to take us through to the boarding area!

What caused the delay - traffic! Coming from a very well organized traffic system in Singapore, traffic in Manila just does not make sense. There are bottlenecks everywhere, getting from point A to point B drivers, bikers and pedestrians become a "free for all"affair. Buses, jeepneys, motorcyles, cars weave their ways in and out of traffic to find a route that is the "fastest". Whether it is safe or not, that does not matter. For a passenger like me, being in such a situation not only made me anxious but it also made me nervous - all sorts of what ifs come into mind... lorries, cars do not give way to other cars - making me really nervous. Each time when that happens, I have to close my eyes and pray that all goes well.

After last Fri's incident, I'm proud and thankful that I am Singaporean.. and I can always adopt that kiasu syndrome. In future, I will make sure I leave the office way way way early - 4hrs earlier if need be!

A Run in the Park

I woke up this morning with a sudden urge to go for a long run. I do run on some mornings before I head for the office but today, I wanted to run in a park. After breakfast, I told hubby to take us to Bukt Batok Nature Reserve. As the lil one rode on his bike and Abah followed him close, I ran and ran and ran. It was not that long a run but the feeling of sweat running down my back made me happy. Lil' one kept calling me to wait for him.

We have been to Bukit Batok Nature Reserve many times but we have never explored the park. Today, we decided to do just that and I'm glad we did. The serene ambience of the park provides an ideal place for a peaceful walk, to be away from the hustling and bustling of the city and a place where one can just sit down and take in the nature. The picturesque pond while being still tells you that it is alive and to stay away. As I took in the beauty of the park, I do know that we will return to the park again soon and this time round, my lil one will be on his stroller while his mama and Abah run.

Trucks Trucks and more trucks!

My lil one loves trucks. His interest in trucks started when he turned 1 - exactly a year ago. Don't ask me why. It could be the daily rides to grandmas' homes and back. There are many trucks on the roads these days.

To date, he has 5 big trucks - dump truck, cement truck, rubbish truck, petrol truck and fire engine. If you asks him who drives the fire engine, he will tell you it's "Ah Boy". If you asks him where are his trucks, he will tell you it's parked or rather "Parking" and makes that reverse sound when a car parks. And if you ask him if he wants to be on a truck - he will pause, looks at you and says "No". Ask him why and he will say "Adli takut".

Walauwey...

My Resolution

One of the things that I promised myself to do this year is hit the gym.
It's 12 days into the new year and I have not even step foot in the gym.

Why?
I have had free lunches and drinks almost everyday since 5 Jan. I spent the weekend at my couz wedding and there was more food.

I was determined to start the day right today, got up really early to pack and managed to do some stretches and sit ups. I even had Weet Bix for breakfast.

Told myself, lunch would be salad.... I had pizza and fried chicken wings instead. *sigh*
How come you ask? Meeting during lunch hour, boss ordered food and she liked fast food and fried stuff. HELP. Will this be a weekly affair I asked? I was told to be prepared to gain weight. Yikes! I cannot afford that!

Got into Bandung this evening and more food. HELP... when will I ever stop eating?!

My alarm clock is set at 530am and I have made an appt with an instructor at 630am tomorrow.
I look forward to seeing the treadmill and sweating it all out tomorrow.

Motherhood

I am enjoying motherhood.
However I am unwilling to give up my career or take a step back from my career.
Being a mother certainly have its challenges and the love of a child is hard to describe. It gives me happiness and love that I get from no other.
But monetary rewards, the sense of acomplishments that I get from the work place is rewarding too.....

This 2009

I have to resist the splurge to purchase things that will cost me my future.
I will embrace change - I'll start by taking on a hobby which I have left untouched for a LONG time!

I'll be Back - Simpang Bedok

Exactly 2 years ago, in my blog I said I will NEVER step foot in Simpang Bedok. I am retracting that.
I had one of my scrumptious meals at Simpang Bedok; complete with teh tarik.
I am happy and I will definitely make my way there again for another makan session :)

Sweet Revenge

The much awaited announcement finally came on Thursday close to 12nn. I received non-stop phone calls from colleagues in office and from those who are traveling. I was updated with whatever that was going on in the office.
I was happy, relieved and finally, finally I see changes in 2009. I don't know what is in store for us but at least for now I know I can start focusing on my area of work again. Now I feel rejuvenated, motivated and free!
I know someone who did not take the news well. I know he is probably peeing in his pants and is probably thinking of ways to amend his relationship with the new boss.

Indonesia Got Talent

The last 4 days in Indonesia clearly showed me that Indonesia has got a natural pool of talents. The local music scene here rocks - the music are fantastic - very touching lyrics about friendship, ambitions and yes love and the singers are very gorgeous and wild!!! I have been to several live shows back home but nothing compares to this particular one. Every kid in the hall were singing along to the song of their idols, screamed their lungs out when their idol comes on stage, stomp the floor when they had to wait - all in unison. They are such great crowd audience that I definitely say we make history today in Indonesia TV scene for kids.
Even when we had to pull a kid from the crowd to sing, I was amazed at how good his voice was. There was a kid comedian who came up during commercial breaks to warm up the crowd - he made me laughed so hard, I cried.

The people I meet here are down to earth, simple, respectful, sincere, easy going and love to look for funny little things in everything they do. The celebrities are young (mostly 14 -early 20's), extremely gorgeous - and very respectful to the elders - something that I do not get to see back home. I was in awe when they sang and definitely I am now more keen to explore the world of Indonesian music.

My First Production Experience

When our partners in Indonesia informed us that they want to produce our only kids award show, I wasn't that excited. They only gave us 3 months notice - this awards show is their first, and first in Asia too - usually we take about 12-18 months to prepare.

We managed to arrange for several consultants to help us. One of them is Bob Bain - an EP who has done numerous live event shows in the US. I felt like I was back in college - I learnt so much and made me love my job even more. He was just amazing - first of all, not your typical loud American. He is humble, cautious and approachable. Most importantly, he shared with us his experience and gave us ample warnings of what to look out for in a "live" show. Closer to the big production day, I was involved in production calls - going through rundowns, scripts, the gimmicks, the camera positions, the SLIME (of coz, our channel signature) and having to listen to each musical act. 4 days prior to THE day, I came to Jakarta and met another Consulatant called Bernard Edward but calling him Bernie is so much more apt. He is eccentric, funny, looks like mad scientist. He is so wacky and crazy that being with him in the control room is like being in a show itself. He dances to the camera each time he hits the VT button. Simply a joy.

Working with the production team here is very interesting. I'd like to blame it on culture and lifestyle - where I come from everything runs according to schedule but here nothing goes on schedule! It was interesting though... there are instances where I think my heart flipped a few times and I felt like giving everyone a nudge here and there but hey, it worked out in the end and that is the most important thing.

But all in all, this is definitely one major highlight in my career and I am very thankful to have been given this opportunity.

Peking Duck

Do you believe in "What Goes Around Comes Around?" Yeah, I do and I was put in the same situation 4hrs later. What happened you want to know. I had my first taste of duck's meat in Indonesia.

That same afternoon over tea, I dared an American guy to try the cow's tongue satay. The Indons call it Satay Padang. He did eventually and was pretty cool about it. Of coz when he called his family back home and told them what he did, they were proud of him.

That evening, he wanted to have Chinese food for dinner and while I was ordering food, he said he would like to try Peking duck. I ordered but of course when the dish came I did not bother trying it.

Despite the engaging conversation we had, he noticed and insisted that I have my share. No choice but to confess, told him I have never eaten duck's meat. He found that amusing and dared me to eat it. I did eventually - I made sure i added as much hoisin sauce as possible. The minute I swallowed, I kept drinking lots of tea to wash away that oily taste - of course like him, I remained cool.

My First Night Out with Germans

SS invited me to her b'day party on Tuesday last week. She said, it's a small party amongst close friends only. I suspected that her other friends are Germans and true enough when I got to the apartment I was greeted by Germans. It was pretty entertaining listening to them speak in their language (yes, they do translate and fill me in between their conversations) - while I don't understand their language, looking at their animated faces and picking up several English words in their conversation, I could tell what they were saying. Interestingly, while watching their mouth and listening to their conversations, I could not help but noticed that their language sounded a little like Dutch language - the "heute" and the "der" are similar... heh, not that I can speak Dutch language in the first place. I had an interesting and entertaining evening. I went back to the apartment that night wanting to know more about Germans and their culture and I hope to go to Germany one day for a vacation.

Creme Brulee

I am not a dessert person but I will never resist Creme Brulee while in France. I had Creme Brulee almost every evening while in Cannes last week. I just love the way the custard and the hard caramel feels in my mouth. I have tried making this dessert on my own several years ago but could not get the caramel toping right. Practice makes perfect... I must consider making it again.

CB & SS

These 2 ladies offered me a position at Nick 8 years ago. SS decided to leave and I came in to replace her. CB informed me that my first business trip was to Mumbai and that was 2 days after I joined Nick. 2 months later, CB told me she wanted to resign and I hated her to leaving me in the deep end of the pool. I had no choice but to struggle and stay afloat. Fast forward 8 years later, I join them for cheese and drinks in one of the nicest apartments on Rue de Antibes in Cannes. Who would have thought I would one day tell them I did not appreciate what they did to me before but am lucky that they had given me an opportunity to work for a great brand. And most importantly, today we are all friends.

OCD

Obsessive Compulsive Disorder - that's what my friends tell me whenever I tell them I did housework in the middle of the night. I did the same again last night - I could not sleep when I see dust on the floor, clothes to be ironed and toilets to be cleaned. You see, I am leaving this evening for Cannes and will be gone for 10 days. I know hubby will clean the house while I'm gone, but I don't think he can manage looking after the small one and doing housework at the same time. Hence I decide to help. While at it, I thought I'll just do ironing as well and got so hooked doing house chores that I did not realize it was past 1am when I'm done. I felt really satisfied after and slept peacefully, hoping to get up early and pack my luggage. Alas, I have to do that later this afternoon.

Ramadan, will I get to see you next year?

How time flies... Ramadan come and go. As I sit listening to Mufti's khutbah on radio on Syawal morning, I could not help but wonder if I have done enough during Ramadan. Will I get to see the next Ramadan? Will I get to see the same faces next Ramadan? This few months I lost an aunt, I have visited my mom's good friend in hospital twice and she is still unconscious, I have followed my mom to visit another one of her friend whose husband's health has deteriorated and is now very ill. I wonder will I get to hear some good news in the next few months, will I get to see the same faces today, tomorrow?

Iftar Part 2

Iftar session was at ESST restaurant in Westin Hotel. The restaurant has a modern zen open kitchen concept and includes individual private rooms. We had one of the rooms. The restaurant carries a variety of Asian cuisines ranging from Vietnamese to Japanese to Chinese, Malay and Thai. I ordered a little of everything.

I am no foodie so I really cannot comment on the food. However, I do like the ambience of the private room and I was lucky because one of the partners that I sat with has a very interesting character and personality. I have to admit I enjoyed the conversation that we had and his weird humor. I also get to know more of the TV viewing habits in Malaysia for the older audience. All in all an interesting evening... I have to admit, I dreaded the whole idea initially because I don't fancy having a meal and making small conversations but this one was good.

While I do enjoy the food, I got back to my hotel room feeling hungry. I realized I wanted simple stuff like noodles or kueh or curry puff but I got none. I was counting down the hours to my sahur. I had porridge and I ate with much gusto!

Project Saturday

I was determined to run all my errands on Sat - hubby went along with my plans - though at some points I don't think he appreciated it.

First up - pay tithe - done

Next stop - collect baju. I wanted to avoid Geylang at all costs during Ramadan. Unfortunately, our baju were not ready and I had to call the shop repeatedly to pressure them to deliver our baju on a particular date. It worked, I got our baju and the lady was apologizing to me profusely :)

Next - prayer call - by the time hubby did his sholat, it's almost time to break fast. I don't fancy breaking fast out but this time round I had no choice. Hubby chose the venue - not that far away from Masjid Sultan. I don't like the location and I think Lil Adli did not either. He gave us both a hard time throughout.

After Maghrib sholat, we went to our final stop - one of the carpet shops on Arab Street. Yep, bought carpets - not one, not 2 but 4 pieces! I don't know what got into us, suddenly we decide to buy carpets for our dining area, living room, corridor and prayer room! :P

Iftar Part 1

Last week my boss sent a few of us a note. Basically he wants us to go to KL with him for iftar with some partners. Some colleagues decided to arrange for some meetings with their clients, I choose to stay put in Singapore, work till 2pm and take the 3pm flight for iftar at 7-ish. Silly don't you think? One colleague tried to convince me to stay for the night and take the 8am flight back the next morning. I intend to take the last flight out of KL the same day. Ambitious? Yeah I think so. Can I make it? InsyaAllah.

My time with Lil Adli is so precious. I would rather come home tired, cuddle my 2 loved ones and play with Lil' Adli in the morning.

Expensive iftar? You bet.

Necessary? In my opinion, not at all.

Tithe

Every Ramadan, I take a day off to fetch my mom to Jamiyah and Darul Ihsan for her to pay her tithe. I did the same last Friday.

On our way there, mom wanted to go to NTUC to buy a packet of rice. She said she wanted to pay her tithe with rice. "Ikut sunnah Nabi" she said. I obliged but kept my comments to myself.
When we got to the mosque, her action caught MUIS rep by surprise. I don't blame him and tried calling MUIS to see if they would accept the packet of rice. No one responded to the call.

Back in the car, I asked her why she did what she did. She told me Ustaz F informed everyone during class, its good to follow sunnah Nabi - yep, I agree, good to ikut sunnah Nabi. However, there must be a damn good reason for MUIS to establish the current system right? Imagine all the other neneks in her class carrying packets and packets of rice to the mosque to pay their tithe and they receive the same treatment as my mom? Tulang dah kerepot, kaki dah lemah, angkat beras berat only to be informed the mosque tak boleh terima their fitrah. Tak kesian tu?

Are Singaporeans Insensitive?

Last Thursday I was in Jakarta and a colleague who was traveling with me is a non-Muslim. It was lunch time and our partner brought her food and invited her to one of the meeting rooms to eat. I was with the mbak U'ut and she told me that in most restuarants and foodcourt, non-Muslims can only eat in designated area... separated by a curtain. I asked her if her non-muslim colleagues would drink or eat in front of the Muslims and she said not at all.

I was impressed.

Several years ago when I was in Manila during Ramadan, I asked to be exused for 5mins during a meeting to break my fast ( it was about 430pm then). When one of my Filipino colleagues found out the reason why, she quickly ordered a hot cup of coffee for me. That was very thoughtful of her.

In Singapore, first day of Ramadan coincide with the mid-Autumn festival. I received boxes and boxes of mooncakes which I give away to my colleagues to eat. Interestingly, between mouthfuls of snowskin jackfruit mooncakes, one colleague exclaimed and said, "Alamak, Zan Puasa lah...sorry sorry " but he never stopped eating and the rest didn't either. While I don't mind people eating in front of me, i thought when someone exclaimed something like that, they would be sensitive enough to quickly stop eating right. Well, I was wrong.

So are Singaporeans insensitive?

Thank goodness not. One of my colleagues was eating an apple when she came by my desk. She remembered I was fasting and quickly hid the apple behind her back, got the info she wanted and quickly walked away.

Sept 11

I was at the ariport on Sept 11 to go to Jakarta. It was pretty quiet and the plane was not even full. It was unusual for a 750am flight to not be full. I decided not to mention anything until my colleague passed a comment. We both looked at each other, that knowing look and decided to quickly leave the airport.

A day earlier, I realized the date and voiced my concern to a girlfriend. She told me not to worry - because the terrorists are Muslims and they will not have the energy to strategize or hijack a plane. Yes, I laughed along with it but was still worried.

Alhmadullilah. I had a safe trip and came home at 11-ish feeling very hungry.

Project E2 + 1

When my boss proposed Project E2 + 1 to a few of us, he came prepared and even showed us the roadmap to get there. Despite telling him that the monetary perks will not appeal to the team, he refused to listen but told us to think about it. In my mind, there is nothing to think about, it's a done deal and true enough a few weeks later, he proposed the idea to the team. They were quiet, some were unhappy but no one wanted to tell him there and then their grouses. We went ahead and 6 weeks into this project, we have a long way to go.

I honestly don't think we can achieve this Project E2+1. There are certain portions on the roadmap that we can achieve- no problem but looking at some other "external" contributors, I think that could dampen our drive there.

I have to admit, I am tired. I'm trying to sort a few things on my own with regard to work - basically bringing that passion back into what I do and marrying some demands that my boss has thrown at me. Mind you, it is a curve ball and I hope I can continue to swerve that ball and move it in the direction that can make me happy at the same time meet my boss's objectives.

Morning Person

A girlfriend told me once that she would find me very annoying in the morning.
Why? Because while most Singaporeans would still be sleeping, I would be singing and chirpy as a bird. I am a morning person but I don't make noise in the morning. I love the peace too much and I like the feeling of being in my own world. I can be mopping the floor, cooking or even having a conversation in my head - and I am completely fine with that.

Yes, she would find me annoying - especially for a non morning person. I would find her annoying too - why? Life is short - why start your day being grumpy? Breathe in the clean air, enjoy the peace, it does not matter what time of day it is. It's all in the mind.

Ya Ramadan

I was really angry when i left the office last evening. I've worked late many times but yesterday particularly I was determined to leave the office by 615pm -I wanted to be home with my hubby and family to breakfast together. Instead, I went into my usual routine ie. break fast in the car.

Looking back, I cannot recall when was the last time, on a weekday that I get to hear the azan and have a proper meal with my family. For the past 2 years, I have either break fast in the car, on the plane or in meetings in some foreign land. And the only thing I eat is one date and drink plain water. My boss would try to stay focus during the meeting and use my break fast reason to rush through a meeting but in the same breathe, he would leave me work to do that needs to be submitted in the next hour. Talk about being sensitive to other people's religion.

While I can blame work, I think I have myself to blame too. I never put my foot down and say no - no to my bosses for making me work late, no to my traveling plans. I didn't make enough effort to work around the break fast time and to Ramadan.

I missed those days when I would rush home, prepare a meal to break fast with hubby. I missed those days when I would go to the mosque with mom/hubby to perform my terawih. Today, I shall continue to pray - give me strength, patience and show me ways to get out of the current situation I am in.

As I look ahead, 030609.... there's no stopping me from pursuing what I intend to do.

Office Move

No, your memory does not fail you.
Yes, you have read about an office move on my blog before.
Yes, it is happening again - soon. Apparently in Oct but till today an office space has not been found.

I told a friend I send an email to our "Can We Talk" - an annonymous venue for staff to voice out. It's not annonymous because HR reads it and if they share that email to the management team, how can you call it annonymous. This is not the first time I wrote to them via this channel anyways.

My friend laughed at me when she heard what I told her what I emailed. I don't know what is so amusing but I laughed along with her. She was funny being funny and it worked. I guess the reason why she laughed is because in my email to "Can We Talk" I listed down the following:

- the 2 venues that I suggested - one has lots of European offices and one American offices

- how robust each venue is - this includes upcoming projects and buildings and known brand moving to that area

- the additional costs that staff has to inquire - not a good time because of rising inflation and prices

And of course the part where she laughed out loud:

- the distance from the office space to an MRT station - to be exact about 500m-800m

But they are all good and valid reasons. So all one can do now is wait.

03-06-09

If everything remains at ceteris paribus, then come this date things will change on my end.
I've been thinking about it over the weekend - think hard. Plus I was reading a book called "Tuesdays with Morris" and there are a few things that I read made a lot of sense. I begin to question everything that I do professionally and I asked myself whether I am being selfish. I know I have admitted it before - where professional life is concerned but I also do feel guilty at times. I have been lucky because both parents have been very supportive of me and hubby.

It does not help either when I went to my regular religious class last night, the same issue was raised and the emphasize of having a balance is repeated. I have heard it before, I know it is right but why am I still stuck doing the same thing?

I've decided, come 03-06-09 I have to make one final decision - may be painful and scary but I will have to. Till then, I shall save as much moolah as possible.

Wait For Me!

Lil Adli is picking up lots of words lately.

Every morning, I would carry him up the stairs to the carpark. Sometimes he could climb up the stairs on his own. His father would be waiting for him at the car.

One of the mornings, he wanted Abah to climb up the stairs with him. So he said "Abah... Wait Or me! (as in Wait for me!)"... and this morning he said "Wait or Me! m coming!"

It was so cute but I could not laugh... in case he decides to not say it again :)

An Arrogant Guai Lo

I was introduced to a Guai Lo recently. He works in this industry, a Creative person and based in Malaysia. He came across as someone who likes the attention and super talkative. I never like talkative guys to begin with but I decided to chat this guy up - who knows, we could one day use his expertise, contacts and services should we have some business opportunities in Malaysia. He joined us for lunch. And our conversations went like this - he was seated in front of me...

Guai Lo: Ah, I get these kind of dishes in Malaysia... (he said to everyone at the table)

Me: but this one here is the best. You can't get the same anywhere in Malaysia

Guai Lo: of course you can, it's all Malay food. same

Me: No, they are not the same. This is from Padang.

Guai Lo: Ah, Malaysia, Singapore, Indonesia, Philippines, they are all the same. Malay. (all these while, he spoke arrogantly)

I decided to end the conversation because I was very close to saying "Are you saying that all Europeans are the same too? Dutch, German, Swiss?" I figured, I would have created a tense moment then... the best is to ignore such ignorant Guai Los and enjoy my food.